Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO - OCTOBER 22 - 28, 2001
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PEOPLE
BRITNEY SPEARS TREATED FOR SNAKEBITE
Hundreds of teenage boys volunteer to suck out venom.
BUSINESS
FAA to Perform Background Check of All Airport Employees With Secure Access
Announcement comes just five weeks after attacks.
Leftists Bomb Coca-Cola Plant in India
Rightists bomb Pepsi plant in Pakistan.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Emmys Will Take Place:
National Spirit Cited

Need for Americans to know there are people phonier than themselves.
Anthrax Detected in Cleveland
Forces closure of Rock 'N Roll Hall of Fame.
THE FIGHT FOR FREEDOM

Profiles of Our New Allies: Brunei

Type of government: Muslim Monarchy
Head of State: Sultan Sir Hassanal Bolkiah
Prime Minister: Sultan Sir Hassanal Bolkiah
Defense Minister: Sultan Sir Hassanal Bolkiah
Finance Minister: Sultan Sir Hassanal Bolkiah
Method of Governing: By decree
Length of Time Country Has Been Ruled by Same Family: 6 centuries
Most Lovable National Characteristic: Rich oil reserves
 
CORRECTION
Last week, in an article about CBS's decision to develop a sitcom based on the World Trade Center attacks, we described it as “using a national tragedy for crass and commercial purposes,” “exploitation of a nation's grief,” and “irresponsible behavior of the worst kind by a large corporation.” Missing, due to a typo, was the phrase “sick and immoral act of depravity.” We are sorry for any confusion this may have caused.

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