Ironic Times

page one
PAGE TWO – DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2003
page three

PEOPLE
Gerald Ford Honored at Charity Event With "Special Giving Award"
Former President agreed to accept honor for fee of only $200,000.
Newly Released Tapes Reveal
Nixon Disliked Reagan

Tapes will be played on Showtime.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Lord of the Rings - the Return of the King Epic is Bigger Than Life
Also longer than life.
 
BUSINESS
Cable, Satellite, Phone Firms Face New Competition
Water, gas companies to offer same services through their pipes.
Breakthrough: IBM Develops Computer Chip Material That Assembles Itself
Everyone at IBM is fired.
Ford's 300 Millionth Vehicle Rolls Off Assembly Line
Same day as company announces recall of 300 million vehicles.
SCIENCE
Scientists Freeze Beam of
Light - Success Could Lead
To Quantum Computers

And refrigerators where light is always on.
Canadian Study: Men's Ability to Act Rationally Reduced by Pretty Women
Entirely eliminated by very pretty women.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Glaxo Chief Admits Most Drugs Do Not Work for Most Patients
Nevertheless, “crapshoot for high rollers” still attracts many.
 
Poll: Americans Divided About
New Medicare Law

Some like it more than others.
 
ENVIRONMENT
Mercury Lovers Declare
Victory at EPA

Relaxed air standards will give them all the mercury they've been asking for.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2003 Ironic Times