Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – FEBRUARY 14 - 20, 2005 
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RELIGION
Supermodels Reenact “Last Supper”
As with original, hardly any food is consumed.
British Poll: Public Says Seven
Deadly Sins Should Add Cruelty,
Adultery, Bigotry

And drop gluttony, sloth, envy.
 
SPORTS
Super Bowl Champs, Former
Team Members, Americans
Living Abroad Celebrate

Patriots, ex-Patriots, expatriates party.
 
PEOPLE
Berlin: Postcard Mailed to Hitler
60 Years Ago, Finally Arrives

It was from a friend in Brazil, who wrote, “Wish you were here.”
Buckingham Palace Approves Title for Camilla Parker Bowles
She'll be known as Her Royal Homewrecker
FEATURE
There is only one question on this test, but you must get it right to pass the course.
Investments offering higher rates of return are:
  A) higher risk.
  B) equal risk.
  C) lower risk.
 
HIGH TECH
New Biometric Device Can
Verify Age

Hailed as potential life-saving tool for singles.
 
ODDS 'N ENDS
 
Vermont Teddy Bear Co. Will Withdraw Straitjacketed “Crazy For You” Bear
Also will recall shackled “Detained For You” Bear, leashed “Tortured For You” Bear, and beheaded “Lost My Head For You” Bear.

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