Ironic Times

page one
PAGE THREE – JULY 4 - 10, 2005
page two

TRAVEL
Gambling Casino Planned for Gettysburg
Dedicated to the proposition that all suckers are created equal.
 
DRUGS
U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services Releases Map of
Marijuana Use

Should help distributors target states where use lags.
 
YOUR GOVERNMENT IN ACTION
Scientists have their own, impenetrable jargon. This report by scientists at the Bureau of Land Management on regulations opening public land to cattle grazing in the West was altered for clarity by your government. (see below)
AMAZING TALES OF THE PARANORMAL
 

A prominent GOP congressman from San Diego sold his house to a military contractor for $700,000 more than the house was worth, and the very same military contractor was awarded huge government contracts by the very same congressman! And that congressman lives on a yacht owned by...the same military contractor!
 
RELIGION
76% of American Doctors
Believe in God

Find it convenient to blame Almighty for their mistakes.
 
BOOKS
Rare 1st Edition of Mein Kampf Signed by Hitler Sold For $43K at London Auction
Inscription says, “To my good friend Prescott Bush, best of luck.”
  What They Said   Altered for Clarity  
  "significant adverse impact" on wildlife.   "beneficial to animals."  
  "The Proposed Action will have a slow, long-term adverse impact on wildlife and biological diversity in general."   Eliminated to simplify report.  
  "Your government helps make things clear and simple so it can act on your behalf!"  

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
 ©  Copyright 2005 Ironic Times