Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – SEPTEMBER 19 - 25, 2005
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MISCELLANEOUS
Man Breaks Guinness Couch Potato Record
Suresh Joachim, 33, has watched TV continuously for 32 years, reports “there's nothing good on.”
 
THIS DAY IN SPORTS HISTORY
1250 BC: Achilles Rejoins Trojan War
After Lengthy Holdout

Denies using steroids.
 
TRAVEL
New Public Toilets in Mexico City Proving Popular
With practically everybody.
Hong Kong Disneyland Opens
Pluto missing.
FEATURE
When is it time to call what is going on in Iraq a “civil war”?
A )When a bunch of provinces band together to secede from the union.
B )When each side picks its own song.
C )When Rumsfeld says, “Is it a civil war? No.”
D )When the daily carnage reaches such a horrendous level that it no longer merits front page coverage.
E )Now.

If the estate tax is repealed, how much money will be lost to the U.S. Treasury in the first 10 years?
A )Just enough so that Jedidiah and Chastity won't have to sell the family farm.
B )Just enough so that Samuel and Abigail won't have to sell the family general store.
C )$750 billion to $1 trillion.

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