Ironic Times

page one
PAGE THREE – JANUARY 9 - 15, 2006
page two

TOYS
Popular Hugo Chavez Action Figure Arouses Ire in U.S.
Pat Robertson calls for doll's mutilation.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
U.S. Family Network Outlines Ambitious Slate of Charitable
Projects for 2006

Tom DeLay's organization hopes to provide millions in legal defense funds to dozens of desperate politicians.
 
SPORTS
In Reversal, NFL Allows 45
And Older to Dance in Rolling
Stones Super Bowl Show

But only 18 and younger at post-game party with band.
 
CORRECTION
 
In a recent article we quoted President Bush saying, “If somebody from Al Qaeda is calling you, we'd like to know why.” The president was not actually referring to you, but someone like you, perhaps your neighbor. We apologize for the confusion.
FEATURE
Jack Abramoff arranged a $1.2 million no-bid contract for a pal with the government of the Northern Marianas to do what?
A )Win exemptions from minimum wage laws.
B )Get approval for “Made in USA” labels for local sweatshops.
C )Provide ethics-in-government programs.
Hint: It's not A) or B), but you didn't hear it from us.
 
HIGH TECH
  Thousands Flock to High Tech Expo
Offered first look at futuristic products, among them (l to r): a novel printer that needs no electricity or batteries; a learning toy for toddlers that also makes and receives phone calls; a “so-simple-I-
can't-believe-I-didn't-think-of-it” flying insect repellant.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2006 Ironic Times