Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – MARCH 6 - 12, 2006
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PEOPLE
Domino's Chief Building City in Florida That Adheres Strictly To Catholic Principles
Tom Monaghan (right) envisions town of 35,000, with manicured lawns, church-going citizenry, G-rated entertainment, total ban on abortions, no sales of condoms, secret stag film parties, adultery, unprotected sex, unwanted pregnancies, back-alley abortions, rising poverty, drug use, crime.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Smithsonian Plans Exhibit on Hip-Hop
Replaces exhibit on doo-wop, which replaced exhibit on bebop.
 
BUSINESS
House Rushes to Pass Industry-
Backed Bill That “Simplifies”
Food Safety Labels

New, simpler warning reads: “Try it, you'll like it.”
Dick Cheney Action Figure Goes On Sale
Harry Whittington action figure sold separately.
SCIENCE
Study: Altruism Begins at 18 Months
Ends at 24 months.
NASA: Budget Cuts Forcing Big Changes
For one, astronauts must provide own transportation to space station.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
British Study: Retirement
Age Will Be 85 by 2050

But life expectancy will be 35.
Warning: Hot Tubs Breeding Grounds For Disease-Causing Bacteria
And some disastrous business deals.
Health Hint: Eating Chocolate
Could Halve Risk of Dying

Eat twice as much and live forever.
 
CORRECTION
 
In a recent article we reported a top CIA intelligence analyst had concluded that the security situation in Iraq was worse than it has ever been, the country was sliding towards civil war and the U.S. military intervention was a failure. In fact, the analyst was referring to Afghanistan. We regret any confusion caused by our error.

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