Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – JULY 24 - 30, 2006
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SPORTS
Michelle Wie Raising Eyebrows, Pulses
Talented teen demonstrates little regard for traditional LPGA decorum.
Atlanta Braves First Team to Score
10 or More Runs in Five Straight
Games Since 1930 Yankees

Feat attributed to lively ball, weak pitching, strong drugs.
 
MANNERS
 
I've been wondering about the etiquette of a man sneaking up on a woman at a business meeting and giving her a back and shoulder rub. Is this proper?
- Wondering in Washington
Dear Wondering:
If the man knows the woman well, and she is a fun-loving, flirtatious person, it can be fine. However, as the photo at right shows, it can also be most unwelcome. It's always best to err on the side of discretion.
FEATURE
Republican lawmakers are starting to question Bush's “stay the course” policy in Iraq because:
A ) they've recently started talking to people who know something about the subject.
B ) they've recently started reading the newspapers.
C ) they've recently started reading the polls.
Hint: You can steal some of the elections all of the time, and all of the elections some of the time, but you can't steal all of the elections all of the time.

The number of state laws passed since 2001 which restrict access to information is:
A )6
B ) 61
C ) 616
Hint: Sorry, we're in one of those states, you can't have access to our hint.
 
LAW
Analysis: President Has Immunity From All Lawsuits
Not related to fellatio.

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