Ironic Times

page one
PAGE TWO – AUGUST 21 - 27, 2006
page three

PEOPLE
Boy George, at Career Low Point, Performs Court- Ordered Community Service
Saturated media coverage leads to new recording contract, two movie deals.
Report: Bush Read Camus's
The Stranger While on Vacation

In case he ever personally has to kill an Arab.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Award Show Presenter Goody
Bags to be Taxed, Says IRS

Oscars cancelled.
 
BUSINESS
Ford to Make Fewer Cars
New ad campaign: “Have You Seen a Ford Lately?”
New Airline Caters to Those Who Can Afford Luxury, Security
Passengers sip champagne, dine on lobster and are assigned their own air marshal.
SCIENCE
NASA Can't Find Original
Tapes of Moon Walk

Fears they may have been left on Moon.
Scientist Claims Dolphins Are Dimwits
Cites abysmal SATs.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Hot Dogs May Cause Genetic Mutations
Public advised to switch to CheezWhiz.
Is Couch Potato an Inherited Trait?
Study says some of us are born with genetic predisposition to become big, fat, lazy slobs.
Spas Offering Healthier Lifestyle
Guests consume plenty of coffee, red wine, dark chocolate.
 
CORRECTION
 
We reported that top officials at the Legal Services Corp., the federal agency which provides legal aid to the poor, had cut their own meal allowances in half to provide more help to needy clients, half of whom are turned away due to budget constraints. In fact, the officials doubled their own meal allowances compared to their staff, while providing themselves with chauffeurs and other luxury perks. We regret any confusion caused by our mistake.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2006 Ironic Times