Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – MARCH 12 - 18, 2007
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PEOPLE
Jenna Bush Working On Book
First daughter's initial effort will be “a scathing attack” on her father's “misadventure” in Iraq and “the sinister underlying reasons that led us into this disaster.”
Fidel Says He’s Feeling Good on
Chavez Live Radio Talk Show

Spins records, makes prank phone calls.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Studios Will Release Some Films “Direct-to-Home”
Cast, crew shows up at your house, shoots film there.
 
BUSINESS
Forbes: Record 946 Billionaires in World
Each receives free subscription to Forbes.
Broadcasters Agree on Payola Curbs That Will Expand Radio Playlists
Opponents say they prefer hearing same three songs over and over again.
New Diet Coke Plus Contains Vitamins and Minerals
Aimed at anorexic health nuts.
SCIENCE
Administration Cuts Funds for
Killer Asteroid Search

Will spend money on Armageddon preparedness.
Report: English, Irish, Scots
Genetically the Same

Findings greeted with identical drunken brawls in Dublin, Glasgow, London.
 
 
Micro Medical Robot Will Search Through Body for Disease
Also spare change, Cracker Jack prizes, other small objects.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: Atkins Diet Works
Just not for Atkins.
 
CORRECTION
A recent article misidentified the United States government as the target of a growing protest movement focusing on state efforts to undermine the Constitution, stifle freedom of speech, crack down on opposition groups, manipulate elections and control the media so completely that TV and newspapers deliberately misrepresent the facts in support of the repression. In fact, the target of the protests was the Russian government. We apologize for any confusion caused by our mistake.

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