Ironic Times

page one
PAGE TWO – FEBRUARY 4 - 10, 2008
page three

PEOPLE
After Seven Years, Bush Says “It Was All a Joke”
Real president was Cheney.
 
INTERNET
Undersea Cable Problem Disrupts Internet Across India
Thanks for calling, our next available customer service representative will assist you in approximately three weeks.
 
BUSINESS
Starbucks Closing 100 Stores
In one neighborhood.
Finally Some Good News
For Average American

Exxon Mobil, Chevron post record profits.
Microsoft Nerds Make Bid for Yahoo Nerds
Google nerds nervous.
SCIENCE
Chinese Report Success
Preventing Rain

Now in talks with Major League Baseball.
Breakthrough: Deep-Brain
Stimulation Reverses Memory Loss

Promises time when “I can't recall” will no longer be heard in congressional hearings.
 
Polar Bears to Be Placed on Protected List
And terrorist watch list.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
FDA Warns Pfizer’s Anti-Smoking Drug May Lead to Suicidal Behavior
Like smoking.
Fewer Americans Now on Diets
As Oprah goes, so goes the nation.
 
HIGH TECH
Using Radio Size of Grain of
Sand, Researchers Tune in
Baltimore Traffic Report

Traffic still jammed.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2008 Ironic Times