Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – SEPTEMBER 15 - 21, 2008
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MISCELLANEOUS
Wisconsin Man Has Eaten 23,000 Big Macs in 36 Years
Note: average American eats only 14,000 in same time span.
 
HIGH TECH
Inventor of World Wide Web Spots
Small Flaw in Internet Explorer

Your computer can be accessed from alternate universe by Seven-Headed Beast of the Apocalypse.
Experimental “Immersive Cocoon” Computer Portends Future
Future where three-dimensional Windows “error” messages appear to engulf you within a totally contained 360° environment.
 
NEW PRODUCTS
Sarah Palin Action Figure Goes on Sale
Already outselling Joe Biden action figure (not shown).
FEATURE
A federal investigation has revealed wild parties, drugs, alcohol and sex, all provided for government officials by energy company employees at:
  A ) the Playboy Mansion.
  B ) the Boom Boom Room.
  C ) the Ba-Da-Bing Club.
  D ) the Denver Minerals Management Service at the Department of the Interior.
Hint: it explains the ceiling mirror at the Denver Minerals Management Service.

The November election may come down to the undecideds on Election Day. These voters are described by polling experts as:
  A ) last-minute impulsives
  B ) eenymeenyminymoers
  C ) out to lunchers
  D ) complete idiots
Hint: it’s the same group which always decides elections.

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