Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – DEC 29, 2008 - JAN 4, 2009
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THE YEAR IN PICTURES
 
U.S. Makes History by Electing Obama
Our first truly buff president.
 
Refrigerated Beach Planned for Dubai
To offset global warming.
 
Cheney Visits Klopstokia
Receives traditional “baring of the breasts” welcome.
 
New World Record Set for Holding Scorpion in Mouth
There was no previous world record.
 
Dollar Coin Gets New Design
Depicts Native American woman planting genetically modified biofuel corn.
2008
 
Oops: Stadium Destroyed Earlier Than Planned
Implosion goes off during halftime of playoff game.
 
NASA Installs New Toilet on Space Station
It's a combination commode/drinking fountain.
 
Hitler's Gold Bookmark Found
Discovered in current owner's copy of new Ann Coulter book.
 
Palin Receives Blessing Against Witchcraft
But after Katie Couric interview.
 
Hugh Jackman This Year's “Sexiest Man Alive”
Edges out Elliot Spitzer, Larry Craig.

QUOTE OF THE YEAR
“I don't know what his beef is.” — President George W. Bush, after dodging shoes thrown at him by a man who shouted, “This is for the widows and orphans and all those killed in Iraq.”

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