Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JUL 27 - AUG 2, 2009
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PEOPLE
New York's Naked Cowboy Running for Mayor
As a “family values” conservative.
 
Britney Spears Converting to Judaism
Shown: Spears kissing her Kabbalah instructor.
Book: Bush Twins Gave
Secret Service Fits

Many still suffer from PTSD.
 
BUSINESS
Microsoft to Open Own Retail Stores
Visitors will be offered virus protection upon entering.
  Car Dealer Giving Away AK-47 With Every Truck Purchase
Makes a great graduation gift.
SCIENCE
Evidence Modern Man Killed Neanderthal 50,000 Years Ago
After argument over whose brain was bigger.
Whole Mice Created
From Skin Cells

But they retain vague memory of having once been skin.
 
Toilet on Space Station Breaks Down
On a weekend, of course.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Lower IQ Scores Linked to Air Pollution
Lack of intelligent approach to fighting air pollution linked to lower IQ scores.
New iPhone App Locates
Nearest Medical Marijuana
Dispensary

Along with nearest 7-Eleven.
British National Health Service: Sex Every Day Keeps Doctor Away
Doctors too busy having sex every day.

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