Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – NOV 30 - DEC 6, 2009
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PEOPLE
People Names Johnny Depp “Sexiest Man Alive”
Edges out Berlusconi, Letterman, Sanford.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
California Mandates TV Sets Be More Energy Efficient
And more entertaining.
 
FACTOID
Americans Throw Out 40% of All Food
Mostly vegetables.
 
BUSINESS
Car Remotely Controlled With iPhone Tested in Berlin
Soon you'll be able to drive the kids to school without getting out of bed.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: Electric Shocks to the Penis Prove Successful Cure for Erectile Dysfunction
Just warn your date.
SCIENCE
Large Hadron Collider Up and Running
Public urged to report any black holes to CERN.
 
 
New Ocean Species Discovered That Feeds on Oil, Sewage, Garbage
Expect to see a transparent sea cucumber in every home soon.
 
WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
Sarah Palin, Ex-Gov. of Alaska
Since losing the 2008 election as Sen. John McCain's running mate and then abruptly resigning as Governor of Alaska, not much has been heard from Sarah Palin. Fishing, hunting and just plain taking care of her expanding brood has been keeping her "plenty busy," she stated by phone from her home in Wasilla. And to that we say, you betcha.

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