Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – SEPT 27 - OCT 3, 2010
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MISCELLANEOUS
Secret Deal Revealed: Queen Elizabeth Forced to Hand Over Control of Her $62.4 Million Yearly Allowance to Parliament in 2006
Most of it had previously been spent on hats.
Study: Twice As Many U.S Women as U.S. Men Lack Interest in Sex
Since that little blue pill went on sale.
 
TRENDS
Kids Learning to Swear Earlier
Nobody has a fuckin' clue why.
 
SPORTS
NFL: Injuries Taking Their Toll
On owners of fantasy teams.
Divorce Trial of Dodgers Owners Nears End
Many expect judge to give pitchers to him, outfielders to her, and split the infielders among the children.
 
CONSUMER NEWS
Bentley Recalls Hood Ornaments
On fear of class warfare.
FEATURE
During the Eisenhower Administration, a time of great growth and prosperity, the tax rate on America's highest earners was:
  A ) 38%
  B ) 35%
  C ) 28%
  D ) 25%
  E ) 91%
(Hint: Look it up.)
 
NEW PRODUCTS
Mattel Unveils Newswoman Barbie
She used to be Weathergirl Barbie, without the microphone.
Bra That Converts to Gas Mask Goes on Sale
Manufacturer originally tried to sell product as gas mask that converts to bra.

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