Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – JANUARY 24 - 30, 2011
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TECHNOLOGY
Defense Contractors Developing Optically Camouflaged “Invisible” Tanks
Eventually they'll make consumer version for soccer moms.
Pew Study: Internet Not Destroying Society
Finds it was already ruined.
 
LIFESTYLE
Study: Attractive People
Have Higher IQs

Still, to be safe, ask the nerd for help with your homework.
 
CRIME
Bobby Glasses, Vinny Carwash,
Jack the Whack, Junior Lollipops
Indicted

SpongeBob Squarepants, Donald Duck, Turkey Lurkey, Chuck E. Cheese walk.
 
EDUCATION
Half of All Students Learn Nothing in First Two Years of College
Other half learns nothing in last two years.
ADVERTISING
Rush Limbaugh Billboard Removed From Tucson Highway
NRA calls removal “unwarranted and ill-advised.”
 
FACTOID
Average American Spent 34 Hours Sitting in Traffic Last Year
Doesn't count drivers who left their cars in the middle of the highway, engine running, never to return.
 
TRAVEL
Tourists Name Los Angeles
Rudest City

Especially people who live at addresses mistakenly listed on star maps.
 
NEW PRODUCTS
It's a $7350 Toilet!
Some of us spend half our lives sitting on one, so why not sit on the best? What makes this toilet different from every other toilet on the market? Price. $7350, at Snap-a-Fish.

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