Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – MARCH 14 - 20, 2011
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MISCELLANEOUS
Provocative Dolls Come Under Fire From Critics
Maker defends dolls, says they're not aimed at little girls but “men in their late forties, early fifties.”
Higher Voices in Women,
Lower Voices in Men
Associated with Infidelity

Based on statistics compiled by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.
 
HIGH TECH
Gmail Users More Tech-Savvy, Thinner Than Yahoo, AOL Users
Also better lovers, higher rollers.
 
EDUCATION
Massachusetts H.S. Wakes
Students at 6:15 AM With
Robocall from Principal

By 6:30 AM, students have their high-powered rifles loaded and packed in their book bags.
 
FACTOID
63% of Those Under 30 Admit Driving While on Phone
Other 37% crashed their cars while trying to answer question.
FEATURE
When will America’s big corporations start hiring more workers?
A )When the economy gets better
B )When already robust profits become even more robust
C )When the corporate tax rate is lowered to zero
D )When pigs fly
Hint: why hire more workers when you can bully non-union workers into working more hours for the same pay?
 
SPORTS
High Gas Prices Could Affect Nascar
There's already talk of making it the Daytona 400.
Nudist Games Begin in Australia
Opening ceremonies disrupted by clothed streaker.

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