Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JUL 30 - AUG 6, 2012
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PEOPLE
Romney On His Offshore Investments: “I Don't Even Know Where They Are”
“To be perfectly honest, I pay a stunning number of people very handsomely simply to track the whereabouts of my offshore investments.”
 
MEDIA
Fox News Reports 83% of Doctors Will Quit Over Obamacare
Based on brief call-in poll of Fox viewers claiming to be doctors.
 
BUSINESS
Economist: Jobs in U.S.Will
Only Be What Can't Be Done
By Cheap Labor Overseas,
Robots, or Microprocessors

Please press one if you want fries with that.
Singapore: “Hug Me” Coke Vending Machine Dispenses Free Coke After Being Hugged
Nearby “Hump Me” vending machine (not shown) dispenses free condoms.
SCIENCE
Knowing Endings of Stories
Makes Them More Enjoyable,
Not Less, Says Study

In fact, knowing result of study beforehand made it more fun to conduct.
Report: Violent Storms Threaten Ozone Layer
And hairdos.
 
Oldest Cave Paintings Yet Discovered in Europe May Be by Neanderthals
Evidence includes vicious reviews by contemporary critics calling Neanderthal art “crude” and “primitive.”
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Pressure Put on GOP Governors to Accept Federal Medicaid Funds by Study Showing It Helps People Live Longer
But they would be Democrats.
Study: U.S. World's Fattest Country
Though U.S. Chamber of Commerce insists we're “pleasantly plump.”

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