Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – AUG 27 - SEP 2, 2012
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ART
Art World Stunned by Restoration of 100-Year-Old Spanish Fresco
Restorer took unexceptional depiction of Jesus (left), transformed it into classic example of postmodern neo-primitivism (right).
 
TECHNOLOGY
Apple Now Biggest Company Ever
Finally surpasses British East India Company, which had its own army and ruled India for a century.
 
FEATURE
Which of the following is now a $12 billion dollar-a-year industry?
  A ) Computer consulting
  B ) Currency trading
  C ) Debt collection
Hint: it's an ill wind.
TRENDS
46% of Americans Have Less Than $10,000 in Assets When They Die
Thanks to good planning.
 
LAW
Federal Judge: Poker's a Skill, Not Luck
“The way I play it.”
 
FACTOID
Americans Throw Out
40% of Their Food

While demanding bigger portions.
 
SPORTS
Former BALCO Head: Majority of MLB Players Still Using Steroids
Only banjo-hitting utility infielders, minor league lifers called up for a cup of coffee and knuckleballers drug free.
50-Year-Old Roger Clemens Poised for Return to Majors
And cryonics experts hope to have Ted Williams ready for the playoffs.

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