Ironic Times

page one
PAGE THREE – DECEMBER 10 - 16, 2012
page two

NEW PRODUCTS
Pizza Hut Debuts Its Own Perfume!
Haven't you always wondered what kind of cologne the pizza delivery guy's wearing? Now you can smell just like him, assuming you ordered plain cheese. And guys love the smell of pizza, which are just the kind of guys you'll attract. $35, at Bloomingdale's and all fine perfume counters.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Congress Bans Use of Word
“Lunatic” in Federal Legislation

Suggests “Santorum” as suitable alternative.
 
SPORTS
Colleges Picked for Bowl Games Reap Desperately Needed Windfall
Money desperately needed to pay for next year's team.
NFL Considers Abolishing Kickoffs
Would replace them with two more commercials.
Berlusconi has announced he will come out of retirement to run again for a 4th term as Premier in Italy. He hopes to form a ruling coalition with:
A ) Center-left parties.
B ) Center-right parties.
C ) Bunga Bunga parties.
Hint: Italian politics have been pretty dull lately.
 
RELIGION
Mormon Church Says Women's Roles Aren't Lesser, Just Different
Separate, but equal.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Party Train to Las Vegas Proposed
Passengers would board in Los Angeles and just five-and-a-half hours later find themselves sitting in a Las Vegas jail cell wondering what happened.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2012 Ironic Times