Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – FEBRUARY 4 - 10, 2013
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TECHNOLOGY
Google Earth Satellite Images Reveal North Korea Prison Camps
And if you really zoom in you can see prison guards sunbathing in the altogether.
Watson Supercomputer to Attend College
Already being rushed by nerd fraternity.
Spam Hits Five-Year Low
According to report you can access at cheapmeds.com.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
New York City: Transportation
Dept. Removing All “Don't Honk” Signs From Streets

Cab drivers end twenty-week hunger strike, return to work.
Chuck E. Cheese Enters Rehab
Family, friends alarmed by popular rodent's personality changes, sudden, dramatic weight loss.
PUBLISHING
Tolkien Estate Embroiled in
Legal Battle Over Lord of
The Rings Slot Machines

So far lawyers no match for Orcs.
 
FACTOID
Walmart Heirs' Wealth
Exceeds Combined Wealth of
Bottom 40% of Americans

Namely, their customers.
 
SPORTS
Over 1 Billion Watch Super Bowl
One-third drunk, one-third stoned, one-third drunk and stoned.
 
RELIGION
Disgraced Cardinal Mahony, Relieved of His Duties, Can Still Vote for Pope
Will join Pedophile Caucus.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Hitler's Toilet Turns Up In New Jersey Auto Repair Shop
Owner says he also has Marie Antoinette's bidet.

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