Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – APRIL 8 - 14, 2013
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MISCELLANEOUS
Los Angeles First City to Synchronize All Its Traffic Signals
Now when you're stuck at a gridlocked intersection for thirty minutes, so is everyone else.
Fed Survey: Laws Against Distracted Driving Not Working
Even driverless cars have been caught texting.
 
POLL
A Majority of 52% Now Supports Marijuana Legalization
And nearly 40% say don't Bogart that joint.
 
SPORTS
Baseball: A-Rod, on Disabled List, Paid More Than Entire Houston Astros Team
Of course, none of them ever dated Kate Hudson, Cameron Diaz or Madonna.
Bills Wide Receiver Tweets That North Korea Should Bomb Home of Rival Patriots
Kim Jong Un says he'll “consider it.”
In the past four years, test score cheating or manipulation has been reported in how many states?
A )Five.
B )Sixteen.
C )Thirty-seven states and the District of Columbia.
Hint: Itís probably more than you would have guessed.
 
LITERATURE
Study: Shakespeare Was Ruthless Businessman Who Grew Wealthy Dealing Grain During Time of Famine
While paying hundreds of starving playwrights a pittance to write all his great works for him.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Florida Woman Finds “Sign From God” On Goldfish Cracker
Along with a ton of monosodium glutamate.

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