Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – FEB 17 - 23, 2014
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MISCELLANEOUS
Barbie Featured in Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition
Already shot more revealing spread for next month's Maxim.
 
CONSUMER NEWS
Report: Toyota to Pay $1 Billion
To Settle Federal Complaint
About Sudden Acceleration

In lieu of fixing problem.
 
POLITICS
Christie Bridge Scandal Widens
Now involves 4 lanes in both directions.
 
POLL
1 in 4 Americans Doesn't Know
Earth Circles Sun

1 in 6 thinks babies delivered by storks.
 
PETS
First: Mutts Allowed to Compete in Westminster Dog Show
Best in Show goes to a Doberlabradoodle.
 
RELIGION
Most Catholics Disagree With Church Teachings on Divorce, Abortion, Contraception
But enjoy stained glass windows.
As an instructor responsible for training you sailors to operate the nuclear reactors powering our nationís nuclear submarines and aircraft carriers, I must give you a test, which you must pass by checking your answers against
A )the answers provided below, but donít look at them now, please.
B )the answers we give you before you take the test.
C )the correct answer, which is always C).
Hint: the answer is not A) or B).

What is this: Australia, Luxembourg, France, Belgium, Ireland, New Zealand, Netherlands, Canada, United Kingdom, Japan, Austria.
A )List of great places to go on a summer vacation.
B )List of places where the food is healthier than it is here.
C )List of places where the air is cleaner, water is better than here.
D )List of places where the minimum wage is higher than it is here.
Hint: even if it's raised to $10.10 an hour.

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