Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JUNE 23 - 29, 2014
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PEOPLE
Favorite to Replace Maliki Emerges: Ahmed Chalabi
You might remember him as the personable chap who misled us into invading Iraq.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Under Development: Biosensors
Worn by Moviegoers to Track
Their Emotions

Also, how much butter and salt they consume.
 
BUSINESS
Startup Raises $1 Million for App That Just Sends Word “Yo” to Someone
Investors think it will be bigger than “Hey,” “Hi” or “HowAreYou.”
Washboard, a Startup, Will Send You $10 in Quarters for $15
Hopes to cash in on our ever-declining math scores.
SCIENCE
New Stonehenge Theory: Huge Rocks Were Played Like Instruments
Those who played them became, of course, huge rock stars.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Climate Change Causing Crops to Provide Less Nutrition
Parents now saying, “Eat your spinach and broccoli, and when you’re done, eat some more.”
Study: Sunbathing Has Similarities to Drug Addiction
Shown: a typical junkie.
 
RELIGION
Berlin Proposes House of Worship for Muslims, Christians, Jews
A place for people of different faiths to gather and disagree fundamentally about everything.

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