Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – OCT 27 - NOV 2, 2014
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PEOPLE
Singing Italian Nun Releases Her First Single: Cover of Madonna's “Like a Virgin”
One review says she gives song “new meaning.”
 
BUSINESS
Cigarette Maker Reynolds American Bans All Workplace Smoking
Employees can take a break every three minutes to smoke in the parking lot.
McDonald's Earnings Down 30%, Coca-Cola Down 14%
Funeral industry down 28%.
 
CONSUMER NEWS
Swiss Supermarket Chain Apologizes for Selling Hitler Coffee Creamer
Complaints ranged from “bad taste" to “tastes bad.”
Toys 'R' Us Criticized for Selling “Breaking Bad” Action Figures
Without including a little meth.
TECHNOLOGY
DARPA's Super-Advanced ATLAS Robot Walks Like a Human
Researchers hope to eventually get it to walk like a robot.
 
SCIENCE
Weird Humpbacked Dinosaur Discovered
Experts fear it will never make a very sellable toy.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: Arsenic Found in
Gluten-Free Foods

That leaves nothing to eat, but there's still water.
Latest Health Trend: Bathing in Red Wine
Leaves you feeling fresh, rejuvenated, ready for your next AA meeting.

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