| PEOPLE |
 |
 Putin Issues Generalized
Threat to Go Nuclear
Strategy: maintain reputation as paranoid
crazy person who could do anything at any
time for any reason. |
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| ENTERTAINMENT |
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Natalie Portman to Play Ruth
Bader Ginsburg in Upcoming Biopic
Also in cast: Jennifer Lopez as
Sonia Sotomayor, Joe Pesci
as Antonin Scalia. |
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| BUSINESS |
|
Whole Foods Stock Down 10% After
Plans Announced for “Hip-Cool” Stores
Catering to Millennials
Millennials think “hip-cool” is
catering to their grandparents. |
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Consumer Confidence Index
Down Sharply
National Xanax shortage blamed. |
|
 McDonald's Bringing
Back Hamburglar
Did somebody say, "desperate?" |
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| SCIENCE |
|
 Earliest Ancestor
of Modern Birds Found
It is believed to have gotten earliest
ancestor of modern worm. |
|
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 World's Oldest Copy of Ten
Commandments Goes on
Display in Israel
Complete with changes, corrections,
revisions, deletions. |
|
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 Egypt Wants to
Rebuild Lighthouse of Alexandria
Already has Library of Alexandria, on a flash drive. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Breakthrough: Researchers
Discover Way to Keep Cells
Young, Reverse Aging
They all expect to be very rich and stay young forever. |
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