Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JULY 24 - 30, 2017
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PEOPLE
O.J. Granted Parole
He can resume hunt for wife's killer.
Trump: “If I Knew Sessions Was Going to Recuse Himself, I Wouldn't Have Hired Him”
“If I knew Don Jr was going to be such a jerk, I wouldn't have had kids.”
 
BUSINESS
Rising Temperatures Forcing Airlines to Ground More Flights
Steamed passengers will fume, tempers will flare, boil over.
Amazon, Partnering With Sears, Will Offer Kenmore Products
Now you can have faster, more reliable delivery of appliances that don't work.
White House Celebrates “Made in America Week”
Highlights products made here, like baseball bats, orange hair coloring, and tractors (not shown).
SCIENCE
Rep. Rohrabacher Asks Slack-Jawed Scientist if There Once Was a “Civilization on Mars”
Then asks if they came here “needing women.”
 

Study: Earth Faces Biggest Mass Extinction Since Dinosaurs
Only tardigrades, cockroaches and Koch Brothers expected to survive.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Many Americans Starting to Question Trump's Mental Health
Many foreigners starting to question American electorate's mental health.
 
ENVIRONMENT
Report: Most of the 8.3 Billion Metric Tons of Plastic Made Ends Up in Landfills or the Ocean
So your metric ton of plastic won't make much of a difference.

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