Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JANUARY 15 - 21, 2018
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PEOPLE
Nikki Haley: Trump's Unpredictability “Not a Bad Thing, It's Really Not”
Like a fastball pitcher who's a little wild.
Bannon Loses Job, Loses Funding
No longer just looks like a bum.
 
BUSINESS
“Coca-Cola Plus” in Japan Has Laxative Added
Also known as “Coca-Cola Surprise.”
 
NEW PRODUCTS
The First Self- Propelled Suitcase!
An amazing breakthrough! Like a faithful pet, this handy valise follows you everywhere, although some have been known to wander off on their own when the battery is low. $299, at Baggage With a Brain.
SCIENCE
In Open Letter, Two Apple Investors Warn Company About Technology's Negative Effects on Children
Suggest putting a stern warning on box iPhone comes in.
2017 Most Expensive Year on Record for Natural Disasters
Narrowly beating out former record holder, Noah's Flood (2348 BC).
Climatologist: California Has
Four Seasons — Drought, Fire,
Flood, Mudslides

In leap years, also Earthquake.
 
NASA: Huge Ice Sheets on Mars Could Make Life Habitable for Humans
And polar bears.
 
RELIGION
Memphis Megachurch Pastor Gets Standing Ovation in Church After Admitting He Coerced 17-Year-Old into Giving Him Oral Sex When Driving Her Home from Church
Now says he'll run for office.

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