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Ironic Times

 NO. 933 “Expect the Ironic” AUGUST 20 - 26, 2018 

Aug 13
Aug 27
NEW YORK CITY UNVEILS PLANS FOR MODERN, SLEEK JAILS
In preparation for numerous Trump campaign officials.
 
WORLD NEWS
U.S. Has Lost Track of Tens of Thousands of Migrant Children Released from Federal Custody
“Kids!” sighs exasperated DHS spokesperson.
 
CONSUMER NEWS
Traces of Dangerous Weed
Killer Detected in Some
Popular Breakfast Cereals

Honey Nut Roundup, Captain Poisonberry, and Cancerous Crunch removed from shelves.
 
ALSO IN THE NEWS ...
Parisians Angered by Public Urinals
Equally furious about public bidets (not shown).
U. S. NEWS
Sessions: Makers of Undetectable Plastic Guns Will Be Prosecuted
When and if they turn themselves in.
Kellyanne Conway Reveals:
Everyone in White House Signed
Non-Disclosure Agreement

Except her.
 
REMINDER
  If you see something on “Fox & Friends,” say something.
 
Trump Speechwriter With White
Nationalist Ties Ousted From
White House

Then offered $180,000 a year to work on reelection campaign.
70 Overdose on Marijuana Possibly Laced With Opioid at Yale
Including 15 future members of the Supreme Court.
Giuliani: “Truth Isn't Truth”
And “isn't isn't isn't.”
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