Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – FEBRUARY 11 - 17, 2019
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TECHNOLOGY
Robots Being Developed to Eventually Take White-Collar Jobs
One thing won't change: female robots (shown) will be paid less than their male counterparts.
Skype Can Now Blur Your Background
No one will know you're calling from prison.
 
EDUCATION
Trump Backs Push for Bible
Classes in Schools

To replace Science.
 
SPORTS
Hundreds of Baseball, Basketball Stars Go Unsigned as More Teams Tank
Owners trying to free up money for oft-injured temperamental superstars fans love briefly, then turn on.
Fewest Watched Super Bowl Since 2008
Only 98.2 million tuned in to see Tom Brady mail in another one against an inferior opponent.
FEATURE
The announcement of Donald Trump's resignation to spare the House the painful responsibility of impeaching him and the Senate the painful responsibility of removing him from office, followed by Mike Pence stepping down, and the next in line, Nancy Pelosi becoming president, was due to:
A )Confusion caused by drugs.
B )A ripple in the space-time continuum causing an event which will but has not yet occurred to appear as an event which has already occurred.
C )Wishful thinking.
Hint: think lovely thoughts.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Luxury Designer Gucci Apologizes For “Blackface Sweater”
Offers full refund to anyone in Virginia who bought one.

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