Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JUNE 17 - 23, 2019
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PEOPLE
White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders Says She's Leaving
To spend more time with her self-respect.
O.J. Simpson 25 Years Later: “Life is Fine”
“I wouldn't change a thing.”
 
BUSINESS
Survey: U.S. No Longer World's Most Competitive Economy
But we're number one in part-time workers.
McDonald's Adding More
Inexpensive Items as Gap
Between Rich, Poor Widens

Will begin selling individual French fries at some locations.
Uber to Use Drones for Food Delivery
Your order free if partially eaten by crows.
SCIENCE
Trump Again Denies Climate Change, Says He Believes in “Weather Change”
Keeps close eye on it, every morning on “Fox and Friends.”
Signs Detected of Mirror-Image Universe Touching Our Own
Just like our universe except people part their hair on the opposite side.
 
Saturn Moon Europa Contains Massive Amounts of Table Salt (Sodium Chloride)
“This is a significant discovery,” says spokesman for Planters.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
New Tests Reveal Popular
Kids Cereals Contaminated
With Weed Killer

Along with artificial flavors, colors and other popular carcinogens.
Doctors Say 120 Minutes Outdoors Per Week Enough
After that it gets boring.

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