Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – SEPTEMBER 5 - 11, 2022
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PEOPLE
Report: Trump “Repeatedly Boasted” He Had Intel on Macron's Sex Life
Carried it with him in a secret compartment in his wallet.
 
MEDIA
Canadian TV Anchor's Firing Draws Outcries of Ageism
Nevertheless, she's no longer hosting "This Week in Hip-Hop."
 
BUSINESS
Employers Struggle With Rampant "Quiet Quitting"
Some force new employees to wear a bell around their ankle.
Branson's Supersonic Jet Firm “Will Fly You Anywhere in the World In Four Hours”
“So fast you'll wait hours for someone to pick you up,” company boasts.
TRAVEL
Airlines, Under Pressure,
Offer Refunds After Three
Hour Delay, Not Four

Or one chocolate chip cookie from first class.
 
SCIENCE
Monkeys Observed Using Stone
Tools to Pleasure Themselves

Discovery pushes back invention of dildo fifty million years.
Toaster-Sized Box Shown to Produce Oxygen on Mars
It will be part of passengers' swag on Elon Musk's inaugural Mars mission.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Researchers: Time to Drop
“Lazy Stoner” Stereotype

Long overdue study delivered to wrong address.
Study: Psilocybin in Magic Mushrooms May Help Heavy Drinkers Cut Back
Just tell the cop who pulls you over you're taking magic mushrooms to cut back on your drinking.

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