| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
 |
 |
Stamp Issued Honoring
Medical Experiments
Recognition long overdue,
say researchers. |
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Individuals' Genetic Codes to be Available Soon on CD
God asks for "some form of copy-protection." |
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| ART |
|
15th Century
Statue of Adam Falls,
Shatters
Valuable work at New
York's Metropolitan
Museum toppled by apple
thrown by crazy naked
woman. |
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| MISCELLANEOUS |
|
Survey: Jewish Population
Declining
And yet, bagel sales are up. |
|
Man
Breaks Record for Time Spent on Bed of Nails
Didn't mean to break record; was merely
"stuck to the damn thing." |
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| SPORTS |
|
Baseball: Contraction Talks
Back on Table
Now Selig proposes eliminating Mets,
Yankees. |
|
Galaxy to Face Revolution in
Major League Soccer Championship
Names of teams obtained through the
Freedom of Information Act. |
| |
| SPECIAL FEATURE |
 |
| First civilian
casualties of Iraq war will be due to: |
| A) | Faulty intelligence on the ground |
| B) | Out-of-date map of Baghdad |
| C) | Reports not confirmed, still
investigating |
| (Answers real soon) |
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| |
| CHESS |
|
Chess Champ
Vladimir Kramnik Beats Computer
But only after spilling
coffee on it. |
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