| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
 |
Archie Comics
Introduces First Gay
Character
Both Archie and Jughead are in love with him. |
|
| |
| HIGH TECH |
|
McAfee Anti-Virus Update
Causes Computers Around
The World to Freeze
Follow-up update easily fixes problem,
but only for those without frozen computers. |
|
New Microsoft Phone Includes
All Social Networking
Need for actual friends reduced to zero. |
|
New Scanner Can Scan
250-page Book in 60 Seconds
Still can’t compete with average
college freshman. |
| |
| LAW |
|
Arizona Legislature Passes
Bill
Requiring Presidential Candidates
To Produce Birth Certificates
Dental records, urine samples, two
references. |
|
 |
| Banks which got bailout
aid from U.S. taxpayers: |
| A ) | cut back
lending more than those
that didn’t. |
| B ) | paid out
more to their own employees than those that didn’t. |
| C ) | had a lot
more parties than those that didn’t. |
| D ) | all
of the above. |
| Hint: think Jell-O shots. |
|
|
|
| |
| TRAVEL |
|
60 Passengers Injured As
Carnival Cruise Ship Lists
When all-you-can-eat buffet opens on port
side. |
| |
| LIFESTYLE |
|
 College Fraternity's
“Old South Days” Cancelled Due to
Racial Insensitivity
Replaced by “Jim Crow Days.” |
|
|
