| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
 World's
First Commercial Spaceport Nears
Completion
Richard Branson's venture will
serve as a hub for likeminded
entrepreneurial billionaires
traveling to and from space with
young, nubile female companions. |
|
|
Survey: Boomers’ Kids
Can’t
Count on Inheriting
Gen Xers reconsider death panels. |
| |
| EDUCATION |
|
Textbooks Replaced by iPads
on Many College Campuses
Ornithology replaced by Angry Birds. |
| |
| SPORTS |
|
College, Pro Football Seasons Begin
Pros have new contract, student-athletes
have new cars, hookers. |
| |
| KIDZ KORNER |
| Vocabulary
Builders |
| chutzpah n.,
when the Governor of Texas
cuts funding 75% for volunteer fire
departments, then demands federal
disaster relief to fight wildfires, while
calling for cuts in government spending. |
|
|
|
|
| FEATURE |
 |
What is it exactly that
Republicans in Congress
so disliked about
Obama’s speech to
the joint session on
jobs? |
| A ) | he wanted the
government to do
something about jobs. |
| B ) | he wanted the
government to do
something |
| C ) | he wanted
something. |
| D ) | he’s
still president. |
| E ) | he’s
still Obama. |
| Hint: and he is still a Democrat. |
|
|
|
| |
| TECHNOLOGY |
|
.xxx Domain Opens for
Business
Now you can find all your bestiality
videos in one place. |
| |
| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
|
 Electric
Motor Made From Single Molecule
Promises future micro-machines so
small as to be utterly useless. |
|
|
