| NEW PRODUCTS |
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 Finally, a
Complete Christmas Dinner in a Self-Heating Can!
Christmas dinner doesn't get much simpler
than this, unless you're ordering pizza.
Unseal the lid and in eight minutes you're
sitting down to a holiday feast even your
dog will envy. Don't ask how it heats
itself, just enjoy! $8.95 at Mr. Lonely. |
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| INTERNET |
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“Gangnam Style” Now
Most-Watched YouTube Video Ever
Still lags far behind “Paris Hilton
Blowjob” for all-time most-watched video. |
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| SPORTS |
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Bonds, Sosa, Clemens on Hall of Fame
Ballot for First Time
Baseball writers will sit down, kick back a few stiff ones,
pop some tranquilizers and then drain an energy drink
before rejecting all three. |
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| PEOPLE |
|
 Marco Rubio
Still Not Sure if Earth Was Created in 7 Days or
7 Eras, Since He’s “Not a Scientist”
Doesn't know his ass from his elbow since
he's “not a doctor.” |
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| What is this? |
| 1. | Walmart |
| 2. | Yum! Brands |
| 3. | McDonald's |
| 4. | Target |
| 5. | Sears |
| 6. | Burger King |
| 7. | Starbucks |
| 8. | DineEquity |
| 9. | Macy's |
| 10. | Wendy's |
| 11. | Darden Restaurants |
| 12. | J.C. Penney |
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| A ) | List of 12 companies most loved by their workers. |
| B ) | List of 12 companies most loved by their customers. |
| C ) | List of 12 companies most respected on Mars. |
| D ) | List of companies paying U.S. workers the least. |
| Hint: Martians have good labor unions. |
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| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
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Latest Fashion:
Men's High Heels
Guys hope to regain ground lost recently to
women in education, management. |
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