| TECHNOLOGY |
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 Apple Watch: Reviews Are In
“Another useless, unnecessary, overpriced
accoutrement that's a must-have,” says one. |
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| MISCELLANEOUS |
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Muslims to Outnumber Christians
Worldwide by 2070
Incidentally, we'll all be starving and
up to our ears in hot, dirty seawater. |
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Report: Your Earwax Says
A Lot About You
But prevents you from hearing what it's saying. |
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| FACTOID |
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8.9% of Americans Have Anger
Issues and Access to a Gun
And you just cut one off on the freeway. |
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| SPORTS |
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NFL Punishes Atlanta Falcons
for Piping in Fake Crowd Noise When Opponent
Has Ball
For first two games team must replace fake crowd
noise with laugh track. |
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| “The unrelenting and merciless
oppression of the….people by a regime hostile to liberty is a
direct rejection of values we as Americans hold sacred.”
What is this? |
| A ) | Criticism by a
GOP Congressional leader of Saudi Arabia. |
| B ) | Criticism by
a GOP Congressional leader of Afghanistan. |
| C ) | Criticism by
a GOP Congressional leader of Cuba. |
| Hint: Hey, Raul, I brought you a cigar,
but don’t light up ‘til I’m out of the room. |
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| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
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Manhattan Highrise Offers Separate
Entrances for Beautiful, Average
Ugly must use employees' entrance in rear. |
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