| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
 Ted Nugent
Says He's Cutting Out All Angry Political Rants
From now on he'll just sit and stew and let it build up inside. |
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| TECHNOLOGY |
|
 More Complaints
About Brutal Working Conditions at Apple's
Foxconn Factory
And lack of a USB port on new iPads. |
|
| |
| SPORTS |
|
Fight Set Between MMA Champ Conor
McGregor and Boxing Champ Floyd
Mayweather
In a prelim, arm wrestling champ faces off
against crossword puzzle-solving champ. |
|
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| FEATURE |
 |
| Translation of the Week |
| Attorney General Jeff Sessions, testifying
in front of the Senate Intelligence Committee: “I'm not
able to discuss with you, or confirm or deny, the nature of
private conversations that I may have had with the president.” |
| Correct translation: |
| A ) | Surely you don't expect me to answer that question. |
| B ) | It's none of your business. |
| C ) | Fuck you. |
| Hint: a.k.a. engage in sexual intercourse |
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| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
 |
 Dennis Rodman
Presents North Korean Official With Trump's
Art of the Deal
In return, receives copy of Kim
Jong-un's book, Art of Killing Your
Relatives. |
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