| PEOPLE |
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 Nikki Haley:
Trump's Unpredictability “Not a Bad Thing,
It's Really Not”
Like a fastball pitcher who's a little wild. |
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Bannon Loses Job, Loses Funding
No longer just looks like a bum. |
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| BUSINESS |
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 “Coca-Cola
Plus” in Japan Has Laxative Added
Also known as “Coca-Cola Surprise.” |
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| NEW PRODUCTS |
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 The First Self-
Propelled Suitcase!
An amazing breakthrough! Like a faithful
pet, this handy valise follows you
everywhere, although some have been
known to wander off on their own when
the battery is low. $299, at Baggage
With a Brain. |
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| SCIENCE |
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In Open Letter, Two Apple Investors
Warn Company About Technology's
Negative Effects on Children
Suggest putting a stern warning on box
iPhone comes in. |
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2017 Most Expensive Year on
Record for Natural Disasters
Narrowly beating out former record holder,
Noah's Flood (2348 BC). |
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Climatologist: California Has
Four Seasons — Drought, Fire,
Flood, Mudslides
In leap years, also Earthquake. |
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 NASA: Huge Ice
Sheets on Mars Could Make Life Habitable for
Humans
And polar bears. |
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| RELIGION |
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Memphis Megachurch Pastor Gets
Standing Ovation in Church After Admitting
He Coerced 17-Year-Old into Giving Him
Oral Sex When Driving Her Home from
Church
Now says he'll run for office. |
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