| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
 Researchers
Extremely Interested in 71-Year-Old
Woman Who Has Never Experienced
Pain, Fear or Anxiety
She's also never read a newspaper, watched television,
or sat in traffic for three hours. |
|
|
Revealed: Family That Owns Krispy Kreme
Doughnuts Has Nazi Past
And future heart trouble. |
| |
| TECHNOLOGY |
|
Artificial Intelligence Can
Now Write Fiction
Already working on The Great American Algorithm. |
| |
| EDUCATION |
|
Stanford Beats Out Harvard, Yale, With Lowest
Admissions-to-Applications Rate of 4.2%
Better weather, say experts. |
| |
| SPORTS |
|
NFL Expands Use of Replays
To Include Pass Interference,
Blindside Blocks
And wife-beating. |
|
| FEATURE |
 |
| How much does it cost
to hire a professional test-taker to take the SATs
for your kid so he or she can be accepted at Harvard? |
| |
A ) |
$20,000. |
| |
B ) |
$200,000. |
| |
C ) |
$2,000,000. |
| Hint: if you have to ask,
you can't afford it. |
|
|
|
| |
| SPACE |
|
NASA Scraps All-Female
Spacewalk Because “Spacesuit
Is the Wrong Size”
“Makes me look fat,” says astronaut. |
| |
| ODDS 'N' ENDS |
|
 Pope Filmed
Repeatedly Pulling His Hand Away
From People Trying to Kiss His Ring
Says he's lost three rings this month. |
|
|
