| PEOPLE |
 |
 Trump Says He
Spoke to Barron About Crisis
“He told me it's bad,” he says. |
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| MEDIA |
|
 Trump's Favorite
Show "Fox & Friends" Adopts Social Distancing
Changes name to “Fox & Acquaintances.” |
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| BUSINESS |
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Senators Sell Millions in Stock After
Closed-Door Coronavirus Warning
And boy, are they glad they did. |
|
 Due to Social
Distancing, Americans Avoid Getting
Haircut
As a result, they've turned Flowbee
into a billion-dollar company. |
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| SCIENCE |
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Scientists Theorize Space
Aliens May Already Be Here,
But We Don't Recognize Them
Because they're all wearing familiar
red hats. |
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Astronomers Discover New
Moon About the Size of a Car
Same dimensions as an early model Tesla. |
| |
 Discovered:
Exotic Inferno Planet Where
It “Rains Iron”
“A great place to visit, but you
wouldn't want to live there,”
according to SpaceTourism.com. |
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| HEALTH / MEDICINE |
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Pandemic Already Causing
Shortage of Doctors
Many hospitals forced to hire actors
who play one on television. |
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Survey: Average Woman
Gets “Mansplained” Six
Times Per Week at Work
Twice as much now that she's working
from home |
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