Ironic Times

page one
PAGE THREE - JUNE 10 - 16, 2002
page two

MILESTONES
Jennifer Lopez, Husband
Decide to Split

Separation comes after nearly 25 minutes of marriage.
 
SPORTS
Baseball: Players Stage
Work Slowdown

Refuse to run out ground balls, pop-ups.
Spitting, Scratching Up
30% in Both Leagues

Blamed on juicier chewing tobacco, itchier jocks.
Problem: Half of All Major League Players Using Steroids
Solution: Share them with the other half.
 
TRAVEL
Americans Advised to Leave India
Go to Israel.
Insect Fast Food Stands Open in Thailand
Cricket McNuggets are the most popular.
UN Disbands
Cites boredom.
War on Drugs Won
Providing dictators with billions of dollars works.
Nader Criticized for Cutting Pollution
Unpopular President faces impeachment for ignoring public's wish to breathe unhealthy air.
First Man Orbits Earth
If human survives re-entry and landing, chimps may be next.
Scholarly Debate Tops TV
Ratings Again

Beats out historical drama, intellectual satire during sweeps period.
More Whites Taking Up Golf
Parallels increasing economic prosperity for Caucasians.
Baseball Owners: Profits
Better Than Ever

Players: We're happy for them.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2002 Ironic Times