Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE - JULY 1 - 7, 2002
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PUBLISHING
Playboy Cancels "Women of Enron" Issue
Hurriedly rushes "Women of WorldCom" into print.
BOOKS
Stephen Hawking Wins
Prestigious Aventis Prize

Award given annually to book read by fewest people.
 
LIFESTYLE
Alaska's Average Temperature Rises 7 Degrees in Last 30 Years
"We love it," says president of the Nome Nudist Club.
 
SPORTS
Baseball: Another Streak Ends
Expos had gone thirty-six consecutive home games without a streaker.
This Week's Question: Do you agree with the recent court decision that found the phrase "under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance unconstitutional?
Jesus: No. It was a damn stupid decision, if you ask me.
Allah: Yes. You heathen Americans don't deserve to be under me.
Yahweh: No. Jesus is right, it was a stupid decision.
Buddha: God is a misnomer and there is no "under."
Ra: I always thought the phrase should be "under Gods."

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