Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – NOVEMBER 18 - 24, 2002
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PEOPLE
Eminem Honored
Named "White Rapper of the Year" at White People Awards.
Prince Philip Called Princess Di "Harlot" And "Trollop" Says Friend
But not "wench," "hussy," "minx," or "strumpet."
J. Lo Cancels Engagement After Misunderstanding
Says she's doing commercial for AFLAC, not marrying Ben Affleck.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Disney, AOL Time Warner Ready to Merge News Operations
"Donald and Daffy Duck Report" already in the planning stages.
Russian TV Game Show Winner Will Fly on Space Station
Loser will take train to Chechnya.
 
BUSINESS
More Trouble For Disney
Discovery of 700-year-old fresco (right) in Austria could mean legal problems.
POLITICS
Rider to Homeland Security
Bill Protects Pharmaceutical
Giants from Lawsuits

Will now be called the "Homeland Security and Drug Company Payback Act."
 
WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
Harvey Pitt

These days the former head of the Securities and Exchange Commission can be found tanning himself on the beaches of Bermuda, where he waits for his official residency to be approved. Until then it's "pass the sunscreen" for this hirsute book-cooking number-cruncher.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Slow Cooking the Key to Good
Health, Study Finds

However benefits offset by stress from having to wait so damn long.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Pope Urges Italians to
Have More Children

If possible, by immaculate conception.

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