Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JAN 27 - FEB 2, 2003
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PEOPLE
  Saddam Confers With Doubles,
Look-Alikes

Iraqi leader wants to hear variety of opinions.
 
SOCIETY
Poll: Most on Web are Republicans
Average user is male, single, 46, balding, takes Viagra and penis enlargement medication.
Harvard Study: Schools Resegregating
Also: rich-poor gap widening, pollution on the rise, war imminent, economy tanking, and you're gaining weight.
SCIENCE
800,000-Year-Old Hominid
Fossils Suggest Our Ancestors
Were Cannibals

Powerful ate less powerful, did not pay taxes on dividends.
Differences Observed in Cloned Kittens
One supports cloning, the other doesn't.
Music Composed From Human DNA
Tune closely resembles "On A Bicycle Built For Two."

SUPER BOWL / WAR COMPARISON CHART
    Serious Injuries   Deaths   Patriotic Frenzy   Luxury Boxes   Advertising 
  SUPER BOWL   Yes   No   Yes   Yes   Yes
  WAR   Yes   Yes   Yes   No   Yes

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