Ironic Times

page one
PAGE THREE – FEBRUARY 2 - 8, 2004
page two

EVENTS
Chile: 4000 Couples Kiss To Set Guinness Record
Establish new mark for most cases of mononucleosis in one town.
 
SPORTS
Everyone Fired
They all hope to catch on with another team.
Houston Hopes Hosting Super
Bowl Improves Image

Asks media to stop describing city as smog-choked, poverty-stricken, crime-ridden hotbed of corporate corruption, lowbrow culture, and spiritual emptiness.
Baseball: Sale of Dodgers Gets OK
New owner's plan to tear down Dodger Stadium, kill all the players, dismember them, sell their body parts, and then build luxury condominiums on the site met with unanimous approval.
 
ODDS AND ENDS
Human Pincushion Says He's “Had Enough”
“It's become a job,” he explains.
As is always the case, midseason brings midseason replacements. Here are a few you’ll be seeing soon.
“All-Dwarf Survivor: Micronesia” (CBS): The network hopes to wring a few more advertising dollars out of an aging franchise by resorting to the latest vogue, dwarfs. But the sight of a sad little person dejectedly shuffling off the island every week could be too depressing for some.
“A Big Family With Wisecracking Neighbors” (ABC): Another sitcom from the creative team that gave us “Office Full of Wisecracking Thirty-Somethings” and “Six Twenty-Somethings Who Do Nothing But Sit Around Making Wisecracks,” this one will succeed as long as they keep the laugh track loud and the plotlines identical to every other sitcom.
“Code Orange” (Fox): In an intense, action-packed series about the men and women who inform us about the current terror alert level, we're taken inside the bureau within the Department of Homeland Security where they actually write the press releases. Don't miss the pilot episode, when the level goes from yellow to orange. Timely stuff.
(Mr. TV is paid $1000 for each good review.)

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2004 Ironic Times