Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – MAY 24 - 30, 2004
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It's that time of year again when network executives roll out their new fall schedules. Here's what's "new" for this fall:
CBS: The Tiffany web has eight new entries, all with "CSI" in the title. My personal favorite is "CSI: Survivor," the first reality show to kill off a contestant each week. If it works, look for a celebrity version.
NBC: With no hits other than Donald Trump's "The Apprentice," the peacock has ordered ten new shows from The Donald, among them, "Call Me a Cab," "Pick Up My Laundry," and "Scrape The Crap Off My Shoe."
ABC: Disney's pinning its hopes on "Extreme Pillsbury Bake-Off," which pits American housewives against Japanese sumo wrestlers in a contest whose rules were still being worked out at press time.
FOX: Not content to wait until fall to cancel its new shows, Fox will instead begin canceling them this summer when they debut six series one month early, all of them having something to do with
FASHION
Janet Jackson Debuts Own Line Of Clothing
She describes it as “evening wear that's elegant, but malfunctional.”
SPORTS
NBA: '05 Season Begins
During '04 Playoffs

"The season's getting too long," complains one critic.
IOC: Transsexual Athletes Can Compete in Olympics
No decision yet on cross-dressing athletes.
 
(TV - CONTINUED)
embarrassing talentless people, a proven formula.
WB: The WB hopes it can turn a profit this year by cutting costs, so all seven of its new shows have the same cast, plot, and location. They could have saved more by not filming the shows in the first place, but that's too logical.
UPN: This network went off the air two years ago, but nobody noticed.
(Mr. TV is not responsible for his opinions.)

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