Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – OCTOBER 5 - 11, 2009
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NEW PRODUCTS
Montblanc Debuts Limited- Edition $25,000 Commemorative Gandhi Pen
For the ascetic who has everything.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Disney Offers Free Entry to Those Who Perform Community Service
Like whitewashing pre-schoolers’ patent-infringing drawings of Mickey Mouse on school buildings.
Oklahoma Has Highest Rate of People Married Three Times
Also highest rate of support for Defense of Marriage Act.
 
SPORTS
Russia's Richest Man Buys Nets
Thought he was buying “nets.”
Chicago Loses Olympics Bid
Most blame Steve Bartman (right).
FEATURE
In an attempt to help guide confused shoppers towards healthier foods, the food industry has developed the “Smart Choices” rating system, using green “Smart Choice” check marks. Which of the following food selections gets the industry-approved Smart Choice checkmark?
  A ) carrots
  B ) broccoli
  C ) Froot Loops
Hint: think multi-colored.
 
SPACE
NASA: Clown on Space Station Causing No Problems
Since crew confiscated his squirting flower.

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