Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – MARCH 1 - 7, 2009
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TECHNOLOGY
Washing Machines for Dogs Catching on in Japan
So far, they're far more popular than washing machines for cats.
“Recognizer” App Recognizes Strangers' Faces
Turns awkward moment into unusually awkward moment.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Man Purchases Comic Book for Record $1 Million
From his mother, who told him she'd thrown it out.
 
SPORTS
Study: Winning Teams Hug Each Other More Than Losing Teams
Especially after a thrilling, last-second victory.
Spring Training Begins for 29 Legitimate Title Contenders
And the Cubs.
FEATURE
Sara Lee’s new Earthgrains Bread is made with Eco-Grain, which makes it:
  A ) totally organic, man.
  B ) pesticide-free, dude.
  C ) like, zero toxic chemicals
  D ) well, actually not that organic, pesticide or toxic chemical-free, but so delicious!
Hint: nobody doesn’t like 2,4-dichlorophenoxyacetic acid.
 
TRAVEL
Some Airports Begin Using
Full-Body Scanners

But only for their own amusement.
 
FASHION
New Fall Lines Unveiled
But at $800, don't expect to see Joe Sixpack in a pair of penis pants any time soon.

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